3.20.2006

The Insatiable Man

Thought you guys might enjoy a couple of the most entertaining e-mails I've gotten over the course of this dating experience.

This is the profile:

Ladies ... this is a strange request. I have fallen in love with the most incredible man, but I cannot keep him satisfied. I am sexy and beautiful, but the man is absolutely insatiable. We live together in the Beaches and I am looking for an attractive woman to provide him with a sexual outlet. He is quite capable of finding women on his own, but I would feel less intimidated if I chose the woman myself. I am open to participating or watching (and my photos are available upon request), but primarily, I would like him "taken care of" so that our relationship can be more manageable.

My boyfriend is a 37 year old post-graduate educated man of Greek decent (and no, he doesn’t look like Yanni). He is strikingly handsome with piercing green eyes, 6’2” tall, 7” endowment, and a lean build. He’s extremely considerate, loves animals, is kind yet speaks his mind, extremely romantic, passionate beyond belief, sexually insatiable, dominant in a sweet way, and capable of making love for hours on end. The man has a brilliant intellect and is the greatest conversationalist I have ever met.

I am seeking an attractive, free-spirited woman who’d like a safe, clean (disease-free!) outlet for sexual exploration. Intelligence is a must, but education, social class, and age are unimportant to either of us. We treat everyone with respect and are not impressed by social status. However, you must enjoy good conversation and be able to appreciate our warped sense of humour.

And THIS is the e-mail:

I've been on line for a few weeks and have been extremely disappointed with the calibre of women I've seen ... and then I come across your profile. What a lovely creature. You are the perfect balance between sexiness and elegance. And, I love the eloquent, intelligent way in which your ad was written. Truly, only a sensual woman can express her thoughts the way you have.

Check out our profile and keep an open mind. I'd love for you to spend a weekend with Dimitri in Toronto, down at the beaches where we live. You and he can take a romantic walk along the boardwalk after a candlelit dinner at our place. My boyfriend Dimitri is the best lover I have ever had. I will attest to his abilities to please a woman. Let’s face it, most men don’t come with references!!! And, he is hilariously funny, with a witty, warped, intelligent sense of humour. He is also "sarcastic and kooky" like you !!!

BTW ... if you want to have Dimitri pleasure you one on one, I am cool with it. I am completely OK with you being his lover. I have chosen you for the reasons I have outlined above. This is an offer I have extended to no one else. Check out our profile. Have the courage to try something new and exciting!

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